A dollar isn't a lot of money. Most of us make app purchases on our phones without thinking twice if it's 99 cents. Around Christmas time, we're most than willing to part with a spare dollar or two for Salvation Army. Hell, the constant up sizing of burger combos cafe lattes doesn't even cause me to think twice.
I think one of the reasons for this is that I know that we're all getting ripped off equally. Sure, the venti is x amount more, but it's clearly posted on the menu. Living in Vietnam is a different story altogether. For whatever reason, some (I really want to emphasize this) vendors, taxi drivers, etc. feel as if it's their right, nay, duty to squeeze as much money as possible from tourists and expats. This really isn't new to anyone who's been to a developing country, but the constant nagging feeling that I'm constantly getting ripped off is a large part why I'm leaving the country. I've had to blacklist so many of my favorite places just because I found they've been adding a foreigner tax to my bills. This is unacceptable in my eyes and would gladly go out of the way for 'honest' service. Referring to a previous post, this is where having a local girlfriend comes in handy; she'll know what the real price is and will feel even more offended if they are subjecting her to the extra premium just because she's dating a foreigner.
A few friends of mine here have conflicting opinions. One says that although she knows she's getting ripped off, as long as the transaction itself is enjoyable, she'll put up with it. Another says that this is Vietnam's way of getting back at her for France colonizing the country. I call BS with both and say they're just selfish. Therefore, I'm effectively banning all developing countries from my list of places that I would consider living. The last straw was when a police officer stopped me and wanted a bribe because I didn't have motorbike license. Sure, I was technically in the wrong, but I wasn't doing anything wrong; I was driving as sane as one can in Vietnam and wearing a helmet. $25 later I was on my way, seething all the way to bar until I could wash down the bitter taste of corrupted communism.
Friday, January 28, 2011
Thursday, January 27, 2011
On Dating Foreign Girls
As romantic as meeting and falling in love with somebody on vacation or abroad is/can be, there are reasons why most these relationships are just on borrowed time.
1) Language
Not being able to carry a conversation does make one think outside the normal coffee/dinner date that is oh-so-comfortable in one's home country. This is partly why people are so attracted to each other; the last 10 dates they've been on have probably been boring, uncreative, and generally forgettable. However, after the initial novelty wears off, the sheer frustration of trying to communicate even the simplest things (ESPECIALLY on the phone) is headache inducing and can trigger unnecessary arguments/fights (which are also unsatisfying because nothing gets resolved due to, you guessed it, the language barrier).
2) Culture
The amount of impact this has varies from the difference in countries, but when people's core values are different, that makes for an unhappy future. For example, being from the states, a secure future is almost guaranteed as long as one puts in the hard work. Although people do aspire to more, it's more or less ingrained that there will be food on the table and a bed to sleep in at the end of the day as long as good decisions were made. In Vietnam, people aren't so lucky. Higher education is still a privilege and I've heard from multiple students that you have to bribe your way to a decent job. With such a huge contrast, it's not surprising that most people in Vietnam put financial security before love when getting married. Although it does happen in the states to a much lesser and more subtle degree, most of us can't bring ourselves to marry someone based almost solely on the prospect of a better life.
3) Geography
Again, this can be a non-issue, but after spending the last 2 1/2 years of my life on the opposite side of the world from my hometown, the arguments about getting married, setting down roots, and raising a family are bound to be heated. Where are we going to live? What is the other person going to do if they don't know the language (there it is again) in the other person's country? How often are we going to visit?
There are a host of other problems, but I'll have to avoid them before spilling too many details about my dysfunctional love life. Although I may seem cynical about the entire thing, they can be thrilling, but aren't as rosy as movies make them out to be. Logical thinking says that a relationship with another Westerner would be more fulfilling and less stressful, but I'm bound to date a native in the next country I sell my soul to (which is looking like Korea or Malaysia at the moment).
1) Language
Not being able to carry a conversation does make one think outside the normal coffee/dinner date that is oh-so-comfortable in one's home country. This is partly why people are so attracted to each other; the last 10 dates they've been on have probably been boring, uncreative, and generally forgettable. However, after the initial novelty wears off, the sheer frustration of trying to communicate even the simplest things (ESPECIALLY on the phone) is headache inducing and can trigger unnecessary arguments/fights (which are also unsatisfying because nothing gets resolved due to, you guessed it, the language barrier).
2) Culture
The amount of impact this has varies from the difference in countries, but when people's core values are different, that makes for an unhappy future. For example, being from the states, a secure future is almost guaranteed as long as one puts in the hard work. Although people do aspire to more, it's more or less ingrained that there will be food on the table and a bed to sleep in at the end of the day as long as good decisions were made. In Vietnam, people aren't so lucky. Higher education is still a privilege and I've heard from multiple students that you have to bribe your way to a decent job. With such a huge contrast, it's not surprising that most people in Vietnam put financial security before love when getting married. Although it does happen in the states to a much lesser and more subtle degree, most of us can't bring ourselves to marry someone based almost solely on the prospect of a better life.
3) Geography
Again, this can be a non-issue, but after spending the last 2 1/2 years of my life on the opposite side of the world from my hometown, the arguments about getting married, setting down roots, and raising a family are bound to be heated. Where are we going to live? What is the other person going to do if they don't know the language (there it is again) in the other person's country? How often are we going to visit?
There are a host of other problems, but I'll have to avoid them before spilling too many details about my dysfunctional love life. Although I may seem cynical about the entire thing, they can be thrilling, but aren't as rosy as movies make them out to be. Logical thinking says that a relationship with another Westerner would be more fulfilling and less stressful, but I'm bound to date a native in the next country I sell my soul to (which is looking like Korea or Malaysia at the moment).
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